Death really does come in threes

In the past 3 weeks I have lost 3 people in my life. I always thought that it was crazy when people said that death comes in threes, but in this case it was right on. On May 10th a former co-worker that I still kep in touch with had an aneurysm and she was alive, but we really were not sure how much alive she was. Her family really would not say for sure. I went to see her in the hospital, she was just sleeping, or in a coma really. She was always one of those women who were dressed to the nines with a matching purse and shoes for every outfit she had. She loved to shop! When I got married my thing that was borrowed were her shoes and they were a perfect match for my dress. She looked bad in the hospital, hooked up to all those tubes and she was on the ventilator. I don't usually go see people in the hospital when they are hooked up to all that stuff, it just freaks me out, but I just had to go see her. I went to see her a few times and I kept up with her prognosis from a few of our mutual friends. I went to see her on Thursday, May 15 and on the way there my cousin had texted me and told me that they had to move my Bigmama to hospice.

My Bigmama was my dad's mom. I spent a lot of time at her house growing up. My grandparents owned a farm and my cousin and I would help my Bigmama gather eggs in the afternoons. She kept everything going on that farm, she cooked 3 meals a day and made sure her family was taken care of. After my Grandaddy died 20 years ago, my youngest aunt took over the duty of caring for her and making sure that she had what she needed. Bigmama had a stroke about 8 years ago and lost the use of her right hand, but she learned to walk again and when she got out of the hospital she went to live with my aunt. She lived with my aunt for a year or so, but it just got to be too much, she needed more medical care than my aunt could give so she moved into an assisted living place. She loved it there. They had activities and played bingo. They had church on Sundays and special outings for the residents. Bigmama eventually got to the point that she needed a wheelchair all of the time, so my aunt got her one of those pwer chairs. That was always funny to everyone in the family because Bigmama never learned to drive, she never had a drivers license. She did run over a few of the other residents, but they always forgave her. She was such a sweet woman, she never complained and she loved having company. Before I had the babe, I would go and eat lunch with her at least once a week. Her health had been gradually declining over the past few months and she had to be moved from the assisted living home to a nursing home. She only stayed in the nursing home for a month. Her eyes had gotten so bad that my aunt had to take her wheelchair away because she could no longer see to drive it. She was moved to the hospice on early Thursday morning. I went to see her on Thursday night, but I never actually saw her, everyone kept saying how bad she looked and I just did not want to see her like that. She was on morphine and was in no pain. She never woke up once she got to the hospice. I sat on the porch for hours with my aunt and my family and just reminisced about the past. I got the call that Friday morning that she had died.

The next Wednesday my co-workers husband had a meeting with the doctors about his wife. The doctors recommended unplugging the ventilator, she had no brain activity and had made no improvements in the time that she was there. They unplugged her about 12:30 and she died at 12:50. I just still can't come to terms with this death. It is just so unreal. She was only 55. She was so filled with life, it is just so hard for me to believe that I will never talk to or see her again on this earth.

Last Wednesday morning my phone rang and it was my second cousin telling me that his mom had died on Tuesday. This is my great aunt that had alzheimers and had both of her feet amputated in the past year and my Granny had gone down to live with her. She lives an hour away from us. She had a urinary tract infection that turned septic and she died. This aunt was my favorite of my Granny's sisters. She was so funny. I went to visit her at least once a month when I was growing up. She had like 13 children and a ton of grandchildren. In the last few years her alzheimers had gotten so bad that she did not know anyone, even her own children. It just got so sad for me to go see her. She had gotten to the point that she could not eat, she was being fed through a syringe and she could not get out of bed. To me she had been gone a while, especially since she did not know anyone. She did not even know who she was. It was really sad, so I feel that she is truly in a better place. I guess all three of them are really.