Moving day

Yesterday was moving day. A day that I have dreaded for the past few years, but one that had to come no less. My Granny has moved into a skilled nursing facility, or as most people think of them a nursing home. I am having a really hard time with this move. She has been staying with her nephew and her sister for the past few years, about an hour or so away from her family. Her sister died in May and Granny has gone downhill since then. She has Alzheimers and senile dementia. Those are just the things in her head, she also has osteoarthritis and some other physical ailments. She still knows everyone. The big A has not robbed her of that yet, but it has made her very mean at times and she thinks that everyone is stealing her stuff. At times she seems to have it all together and then there are times she just doesn't. Anyway, she wasgetting aggravated with her nephew and her sister's other children and decided she was ready to come back home and go into the nursing facility.

I have always loved my Granny. When I was little, she was one of my favorite people. I spent nearly every weekend at her house. When I was sick I wanted my Granny. When I was out of school for the summer I was at her house. When my dad died when I was eight, she moved next door to help Mom look after us kids and I moved in with her. She taught me the importance of hard work and the value of a dollar. She also taught me to look for bargains and always shop the clearance racks first. Anything she has ever had, she always said it was mine. I am afterall her favorite. The few years that she spent at her sister's I called her every week and just let her talk and I tried to keep her updated on what was going on with her family.

But being her favorite comes with a price. I got the pleasure of going to pick her up yesterday for the long ride to her new home. I think it helped having the babe with us. He takes the uneasiness out of a lot of situations! I was a nervous wreck yesterday. I did not sleep well Thursday night just anticipating the move. I was off work and had a few errands to run so it was a little after lunchtime when I got there to pick her up. Of course it was raining and extremely windy from that lovely tropical storm Faye. What a wonderful day to be moving! We got to the facility and I met the admissions lady that I have spoken to so much over the past week she knows my voice on the phone. She hugged me when she met me. She knew how this was affecting me. I am sure in her job she deals with this a lot! She took us around and we got to meet Granny's new roommate, a very spry and extremely nice 91 year old lady. She said she was happy to have a roommate and someone to talk to and walk to the dining room with. We had thought about getting Granny a private room, but she has a tendency to get depressed and not come out of her room, so we decided at least with a roommate she would not be alone. After we met her roommate we toured the rest of the facility and met most of the daytime staff. They have a physical therapist, dietician, cosmetologist, and an activities director. Of course they also have RNs and CNAs and a doctor and a PA that are there everyday to check on the patients. Everyone was so nice. She will start her physical therapy sessions on Monday and we are hoping that will help her blood pressure and her feet and legs swelling. They have an aquarium and a huge bird enclosure with about a dozen small birds. There is also a big screened TV in the commons area and we are getting her TV hooked up for her in her room, so she can watch what she wants. It really was not as bad as I had imagined. It has been years since I have visited anyone in a nursing home. My other grandmother was in an assisted living facility and it was a little nicer that where Granny is at, but it also cost a lot more and they do not accept insurance or Medicare. Mom and I got her settled in and put her clothes away and made up her bed. I brought her a quilt from my house and a pillow in a sham to help dress up her bed when she isn't in it. The babe picked out a stuffed elephant for her to put on her bed and sleep with. We got her room all squared away and then we walked her down to the dining room. The do not have a seating chart, but you know how old folks are, they are set in their ways, so after they pick somewhere to sit, that becomes their spot. We asked the dietician where she needed to sit and she was seated at a table with 5 other people. We told her goodbye and left her in the dining room. She told us right before we left that she was fine. At that point it was me that wasn't okay. I did not let her see me cry. I cried all the way back to her room. Mom and I walked out to our cars together and my heart just felt so heavy.

I can reason with myself and tell myself that she is fine and that she is better off there, but a huge part of me feels so guilty for putting her there. There just is not anyone in our family that could deal with her on a daily basis. As much as I love her, I can only take her in small doses. I just cannot take on another person to take care of that would need someone here 24/7 with her. I will have her phone hooked up next week and we will get cable hooked up to her TV. I just want her to be comfortable in her new "home".