Bittersweet

We went shopping Saturday for a few fall items of clothing for my little boy. We hope that fall will be here before we know it, bringing with it cool nights and comfortable days. As I was searching the racks for clothing in his size it hit me, no more cute little footed sleep 'n play outfits for him this fall. No more little one piece rompers. None of the cute little outfits that make him look well like a baby. No he is a big boy now and we have to get him pants and shirts and things that look like a big boy and not my little baby anymore. I was trying not to cry as I picked him out a pair of jeans, a pair of khakis and 2 pairs of overalls. My hubby walked over and was browsing through the rack with me and I was trying to tell him that I hate the bigger size clothes and I got all choked up. I hate to cry over such crazy stuff.

When I got him ready for bed Saturday and he was finished nursing and I sat with him in my lap snuggled up close to my body, his head resting on my chest and my cheek against his forehead, I prayed for time to stop, just for a minute, just so I could enjoy this moment in the quiet and darkness with my little baby. I held him for what seemed like an eternity and cried. I closed my eyes and breathed him in. I was trying to memorize his smell and his breathing and the little noises that he makes when he is so relaxed and asleep. I have to steal these moments when he is asleep because when he is awake he is in constant motion and does not want to snuggle up and just be my sweet little baby boy. There is an entire world to explore.

Then Sunday as we were playing with his Drop 'n Roar dinosaur he finally mastered the skill of dropping the balls in the holes and making the lights and music play. I just sat back and my hubby and I watched him in amazement. It seems like everyday he has mastered a new skill or learned some new thing. He can now wave, mostly random, but hey the wave is the wave. He can clap and he gives kisses. He crawls faster than any baby I have ever seen. He pulls up on everything and even stands up on his own in the middle of the floor. He has not taken his first steps yet, but they are just around the corner.

The joys of watching your child grow up can be so bittersweet.
**Note the blanket under him. That is his blankie and we take blankie everywhere. He even cralws around with it. He is attached to his blankie. My hubby and I both had blankies as children so I guess the apple does not fall far from the tree on that one. He is my little Linus!