Pierced ears and other things

I have pierces ears. My mom got them pierced when I was like 3 or something. It was all the rage when I was little, all the girls had their ears pierced. People are still getting their little girls ears pierces, but now they are waiting until the child is old enough to decide that they want to get it done. Anywho all that said I got home from work yesterday and my child comes running up to me to show me her new pierced ears. You could have knocked me over with a feather. This child who is afraid to ride the elevator to the 12th floor of a hotel has gotten her ears pierced with a real piercing gun. I acted excited about it, but I was fuming under the surface. Apparently she was at the mall with her mom and decided that she wanted to get them pierced and she let her, with no thought of even calling my hubby and asking him if he thought it was okay. If we had gotten her ears pierced her mom would have shit a cow, but it was okay because she had it done. He was not even considered in the decision. That just really pisses me off. Ex-wife has done quite a few things lately that have really gotten under my skin. I don't get involved though. I am a good wife and step-mom. I just tell my hubby what I think and I drop it. What are divorced men that want to be a part of their child's life supposed to do? He has never seen a report card on her. Last year we never got a school calender. This year I have decided to be more active in her school so we have been notified of things like fund raisers and school functions, but it still sucks being us where that is concerned. Just because she does not live with us does not mean that we would not like to know when she is out of school, when she has doctors appointments, etc. Divorced men who try to be good fathers are just pushed aside and cast out. I know men who live with their children and do not spend as much quality time with thier child as my hubby does. He tries to call every night and tell her good night, (and when I say tries I mean that most of the time either the phone is not answered or they are on the internet), he goes to everything that he is told about at school, he truly does whatever he can to be a part of her life. I am just pissed and maybe I should not be, but it hurts my feelings for him.